Best Sophisticated Pick-Up Lines (esp if you’re not a Pickup Artist)

If you are looking for the best pick up lines for women, you’ll have the best results when you know what catches her attention. Science-backed data tells you exactly what women pay attention to and what pick up lines work. Follow the points below if you want to know how to grab her attention.

 

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On dates, we often focus on what to talk about, but how you talk is just as important

It’s often overlooked but it’s a more subtle, finessed part of conversation. You might think, I’m supposed to just be myself, right? isn’t that the whole point of being dating and being comfortable, getting to know the real person?

We all censor ourselves in one form or another. Since you’re already putting your best self forward, you can enhance it by paying attention to a few things.

Why pick up lines work when you know what and how to execute them 

Courtship and dating follow traditional sociological behavioral patterns and science-backed research tells us the best techniques to encourage romantic bonding in initial courtship encounters through the process of interaction ritual theory. In other words, if you want to build her interest, there are techniques that will give you an advantage.

 

What do women pay attention to?

1) The most important sound anyone can hear is their own name, as Dale Carnegie points out. Use it. it creates an emotional bond.

2)  Women connect more with language that is appreciative such as “that’s awesome, super, fantastic, love it”. And empathetic language, such as, “that must have been tough, or “wow, I didn’t realize it took so much time and effort.”

3) When you speak, in the way you speak, use action words and descriptive adjectives, (this works on your dating profile as well). Why? Because it shows kindness, empathy and understanding.

Kindness – the #1 trait women find important in a mate

 

If this is your first meeting

4) Look for common commonalities, pointed out by research behaviorist Vanessa Van Edwards. Questions such as, “what is the drink you’re having”, or “how do you know so and so”, emphasize shared values.

5) We are more attracted to those we are similar to: the similarity-attraction effect.

         These can be considered sophisticated pick-up lines

They are more innocuous, which women respond best to, they’re on the safe side, they’re not considered non-dominating. While it may feel natural to be more forthright, as men respond best that way, women do not. Don’t be flippant.

A good rule of thumb to follow with pick-up lines is to think about the other person and what they might be comfortable with.

If you’ve met before, bring up something she mentioned previously. Like a work project she may have completed since you last met or an event, commitment she spoke of before.

6) Make open-ended statements, ones that are more like a story in answering, such as “how did you end up moving here, or do you see yourself living here forever?”

 

man and woman talking using best pick up lines for women

Both genders have a better connection when she was the focus of the conversation

So facilitate that. The connection increases when the guy is in alignment with and understanding of the woman. That’s pretty simple, agree with what she’s saying, for the most part. Nod your head, reply mmm hmmm, and practice active listening.

7) Mirror their behaviors, this is called the chameleon effect.  The mimicry facilities liking, do it consciously.

If you tend to overshare

If you dominate the conversation, or share details you probably shouldn’t, such as finances, gossip, or complain, you just need to practice more. Time yourself, talk during three bites of their food, then stop and let them answer and build the conversation. For additional ideas on mastering first date conversation and how to hold her interest read my article here. 

Here’s your short list: 

1) Use their name
2) Appreciative language
3) Descriptive adjectives
4) Common commonalities
5) Similarity-attraction effect
6) Open-ended statements
7) The chameleon sffect

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